Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Diary of a non sleeping baby

I realize I haven't blogged in a really long time. I've attempted to keep up with my cooking blog, so if you don't already follow, go check it out and give me some food love.
I decided to begin blogging about our journey to get our 9 1/2 month old to sleep through the night. Yes, because he still doesnt. If you have the time, come and read my posts. Laugh with me, cry with me, support me, love me!
Kase has never been a good sleeper. From day 1, he woke up all night and would not sleep anywhere but my arms. With this being my first baby and all, I did what I knew to do and have just tried to survive. My husband has supported me and my decisions, since Kase is my first and last bambino. Now, that doesnt mean he's agreed with my decisions! But I'm the mom, AKA; boss,right?!
Kase still wakes up every 2-3 hours. Occasionally he'll sleep 4, but that is super rare. Some nights, when he's sick or teething, he'll literally cry every hour and just not sleep. What do I do? I usually nurse him.
Disclaimer- I am not asking for your advice or your opinions, that everything I've done is wrong, and thats why he still wont sleep. :) I obivously realize some of my actions have led to this point.
I've received lots of advice; "ignore him all night, pat him back to sleep, let him sleep with you, do what you have to do". Everybody has a different opinion, and I think in the end, you do what you think is best for you and your family. Well, I think I'm to the point that dealing with him every 2 hours is NOT best for our family anymore.
Like I said, I've tried to just survive. It's very emotional and obviously tiring, to deal with waking up every 2 hours. I know that if I just nurse him, he'll go back to sleep; so thats what I've done. A few months ago we, I, wanted to try the "pat back to sleep method", so I did. It seemed to go pretty well, and for a few days straight, I didnt pick him up at all. Then he got sick, and all that went out the window.
That brings me to my next point. My excuses. Apparently I have tons of them. I've said Im going to let him cry it out, as soon as he's not sick. He seems to get sick like every other week, so I always feel like its a bad time to ignore him during the night. Then there's the whole issue that I just get so tired and emotional at night, I just can't handle it. Now that he's older, we've run into the issues of him sitting up and standing up in his crib. Would have been much easier to deal with, when he just laid there, right?!
I don't mean to make excuses, but I know thats what they are. Now Im in this situation of having an almost 10 month old, that wants to nurse all night and be comforted by his mama. Comforted by mama; I love that he needs and wants me. Maybe thats a whole seperate blog post?! There's nothing like the bond between a mama and baby. Can I get an Amen? I am so thankful that I had the chance to have a baby, and a husband that was willing to go down that road again for me. My other 3 kids, are my kids. But I didnt birth them, and I so longed to have a biological child. Maybe even another; I kid, I kid. I think my husband and I would both die or go insane if that happened.
All that leads up to last night. Last night Kase woke up 1 1/2 hours after falling asleep. Why can't he just stay asleep?! I just think to myself; what the heck are you waking up for?! So, Husband took the baby monitor and went in the family room. He said we're going to let him cry, and you can go to sleep so you wont hear him, and know whats going on.
Of course I couldn't sleep. Even with the door closed I could hear him cry. I sat there in bed, half tramatized, but trusted my husband in dealing with it. He cried for 1 1/2 straight hours and fell asleep. So I finally went to sleep, but he woke up again 2 hours later. He put himself back to sleep, but woke up again and literally cried til morning.
So we didnt sleep last night. BUT, I'm proud of us! It wasn't nearly as emotional, as the nights I"ve held him crying, and tried to get him to sleep.
Here were the problems with last night:
We don't have a bumper around the crib anymore, because months ago he began pulling it down and on top of himself. So last night his legs kept sticking out of the slats, and getting stuck! I went up to his room a few times to get his legs unstuck, because I felt it was dangerous. That just really pissed him off, to have me in the room and then leave. So we're going to figure something out about that. His crib is solid wood in the back so the bumper wont tie back there. Im thinking I'll probably cut the bumper, and have it just tie around the sides and the front.
Other than that, he just sat and cried. I couldnt beleive he didnt wear himself out, and sleep more. Maybe tonight he'll figure it out, or maybe he'll just cry all night again....
Stay tuned.


  1. I'm so sorry Michele. I don't know what to tell you really. I told your mom many times that I truly admire you. I'll pray for you, Kase and for the family during this time.

  2. Oh mama! I feel your pain. I really do. I have a couple things that worked for us but that doesn't necessarily mean they might work for you. Every baby and family is different. When they were waking up that much at night I started nursing them more frequently through the afternoon and evening leading up to bed time. That way they were really full and just needed to be topped off at bed time. I also wouldn't let them take long naps during the afternoon. I would *gasp* wake them up after a hour and half in the afternoon so that they would be worn out at bedtime.
    I hope something helps! We were talking about this at Mops yesterday. One mom said that they finally had to let the baby cry it out because they had tried everything they could think off. She said it took three nights but by the fourth night he only cried for about 15 minutes and then put himself to sleep. Hang in there. It doesn't last forever- I promise.


  4. Oh honey I'm so sorry you're going through this! With 3 other kids, a house, a husband, a baby who won't sleep has to be the pits! Ive never had Silas CIO, but that's because he sleeps 10 hours in bed with us and takes regular naps. Ok He sleeps well unless he is teething and those times are tough, but I don't care where they sleep, teething is tough for most babies! I'm very cranky when he's up nursing every 2 hours, so I can't imagine always living like that. While I haven't CIO, I'm not a hater. I understand that you need to find balance and you need rest. For your sake, I hope he gets a better sleep routine sooner rather than later. I can't imagine the hurt that your heart feels all night long. *big hug*

    I'm also in awe that your husband has been supportive even though he didn't always agree. What a great man! I'm also lucky to have one who supports me and my parenting decisions. My BIL and his wife are expecting, they are already arguing over how she should eat and exercise while pregnant! She's in the first tri, sick, and tired, he makes her wear a pedometer to monitor her steps each day because he wants her doing at least 10,000! NOT good.

    I'm looking forward to twitter and more blog updates. I love reading your stuff :)

  5. I'm proud of you for going a full night through that!! Hopefully a few more like it and he'll understand that that's the new way of going about it:) He can get his mama time during the day! I hear ya on the standing in bed thing and the crib slats. Once Adelaide has made it to a standing means she's fully awake and it's so much harder to get her back down. My suggestion on the crib slats would maybe be to use a pack and play while you are doing the training. I remember with Azlyn her pacifier would also fall through the cracks so I left a bunch for her and they would all end up on the floor which made it even harder for her to fall asleep(and yes she would cry for hours too, feel your pain!). Of course her legs would get stuck too. Adelaide is still in the pack n play which is why I say that might help that situation b/c I haven't had to deal with either of those issues now. We are still saying we plan on putting her in the crib in Azlyn's room but I haven't hung the crib video on the wall yet, haha...yes that's my excuse. I feel ya girl, you are doing a great job and he WILL come around and sleep through at some point, praying it's sooner than later for you guy's sake! Love you guys!

  6. Aw; thank you guys so much! The encouragement REALLY helps. REALLY! (and the red bull I just drank; gasp. Its good to know Im not alone, and even though other babies may sleep through the night, we all have our issues!

  7. We've all been there. Whoever says they haven't is Cayman wouldn't sleep as a baby for awhile either. I remember going to sit outside so I didn't hear her cry, and so I didn't lose my sanity. I cried for about 30mins, then I went back inside didn't say a word to Jason...I just loaded her up and drove straight to the ER. I looked straight at the nurses and said "there is something wrong with my baby...CAN you PLEASE help me" I really thought it was abnormal for her to not sleep...but in reality it was very normal (just terrible). Hang in there.

  8. This clip from Mad About You is one of the famous ones from the show, because they went for 20 uninterrupted minutes with a single camera outside the baby's room. Looking at it now, after having three babies in our home, it's everything that's loathsome about sitcom storylines that resolve so quickly... and there's really nothing helpful in this clip.

    So at least I'm steering well clear of offering any advice! :)

    Love you Shelly,

  9. I am so sorry Kase isn't sleeping through the night, but I am glad to see you're blogging again! Remember, you're the mom and you know best, and that this too shall pass!

  10. Well written post, Michelle. Your openness and honesty are not only refreshing to read, but they will also be really helpful to other moms. This is going to be a great resource, a resource I wish I'd had when Ethan was still not sleeping through the night at 9.5 months, for other moms in the trenches.

    I think you've done an incredible job being a mommy, Michelle! Love you.

  11. Way to go Michelle and Edwin! You guys are great parents. I'm sorry it's so hard, you've got me scared half to death :) Love you guys, and we're praying that Kase catches on quickly, sweet little guy.
    P.S. maybe you can duct tape the slats, duct tape fixes everything right?

  12. are a fantastic mom! I have been amazed since the first time I met you with how naturally you took to motherhood! I know this is a frustrating time...and no one would blame you for being upset by this, BUT look how well all the other kids are doing, especially Kade, and you are a HUGE part of all this! This is the thing that always helped me..."For every thing, there is a season" and "This, too, shall pass". It has ALWAYS proven to be true! Love you girl, you just keep on keeping on, appreciating your hubby for his support and trusting in your Heavenly Father - for He Cares For YOU!!Love you, Vicki W.

  13. you blogged again! hahaha! well, i know you say you blog on a food one, but i'm more a family-type blog yay that you blogged on this one again!
    you ARE the one that made me know there were even such things as blogs out there!?!?!? hahahahaha...i seriously don't think i had every read one until you showed us yours!!!

    poor baby kasers and poor, sleepy momma and daddy. here's to hoping this passes FAST...angela's comment about the emergency room cracks me up. i never knew that. maybe you should try it???? hahahah. hang in there. you can do it!